Friday, April 23, 2010

Fathering through Divorce by Carol Patton Book Review

The new book, “Fathering Through Divorce” helps dads recover from divorce – mentally, emotionally and financially. Below is more info. 

 Men Mentoring Men Publishes “Fathering Through Divorce”
             Feelings of failure, guilt, bitterness, and anger, custody negotiation, property division, and moving out are just a few of the difficulties associated with divorce. To help men dealing with divorce and its impact on parenting, the nonprofit support organization Men Mentoring Men has published a new book “Fathering Through Divorce” ($9.95, 120 pages). Containing resources and tips from divorce experts, along with real stories from men who have gone through this painful experience, “Fathering Through Divorce” helps men plot a personal course to recover from divorce – mentally, emotionally and financially.
            Nearly half of all marriages end in divorce. Divorce is a complicated life transition. Unlike women, men don’t always have deep personal friendships or social support networks in place to help them get through tough times. However, men who share their experiences with other men can find the support they need to deal with life’s difficulties.
            “Men Mentoring Men is a support organization for thoughtful men to share and exchange ideas and personal life experiences,” says Richard Horowitz, Ed.D., Men Mentoring Men. “We published the book because we wanted to provide a guide for men who going through a divorce to recover, while maintaining strong ties to their children.”
             “Fathering Through Divorce” advises dads to use effective communication skills in solving problems and making decisions.
Here are some tips:
·      Avoid name-calling, killer statements and put-downs.
·      Meet in a public place or email each other to resolve issues about the children.
·      Steer clear of history lessons – bringing up the past should be taboo.
·      Place of photo of your children next to you during phone calls or while emailing to help you stay focused on what’s best for your children.
·      Email your concerns in advance of each meeting so both of you will have time to think them through.
·      Stay on topic and focus on one problem at a time.
·      Create an agenda.
·      Be flexible.
·      Brainstorm solutions.
Divorce is rarely easy. But if you concentrate on what’s best for the kids instead of the problems you are having with your ex, you can ensure a happy and stable future for your children.
“Fathering Through Divorce” is available online through the Men Mentoring Men group at
“Fathering Through Divorce” was made possible through a grant from Men Mentoring Men Trustee Dr. Howard Greenberg in honor of his father Irv Greenberg. For more information, contact Dr. Richard Horowitz, (732) 261-6724.
About Men Mentoring Men (M3)
Men Mentoring Men, located in Somerville and Lambertville, NJ is a self-sustaining council of thoughtful men dedicated to participation in and appreciation of the triumphs and failures of life’s journey by enriching the lives of each other, those they love and the community at large. Mentoring is an honest and shameless exchange of acquired wisdom encompassing the exploration of the myth, mystery and magic of life.

-Courtesy of Men Mentoring Men

I was pleased when presented with the opportunity to review Fathering through Divorce: A Handbook for Men Dealing with Divorce and it's Impact on Parenting Produced by Men Mentoring Men, written by Carol Patton. Divorce may be a sensitive topic, but I am glad there are resources such as this for dads going through this life change.

Fathering through Divorce was produced by Men Mentoring Men, a New Jersey based non profit organization. They were founded in 1996 with the  purpose of supporting men and redefining the concept of masculinity. The men in this support organization share and exchange ideas, as well as personal life experiences. There is no fear of shame or competition. Which must be a really powerful thing because I can imagine it is very freeing for men not to have to worry about these stereotypes. 

Today Men Mentoring Men members come from every creed, race, and background and attend bi-weekly meetings. The members are united in living a dynamic reality as men. 

The book is written by Carol Patton and produced by Men Mentoring Men. There is a beautiful dedication in the front of the book written by Dr. Howard Greenburg, Men Mentoring Men Trustee. It is dedicated to Dr. Greenburg's father and chronicles his hard work as a single father.

I would recommend this book as an invaluable resource for men and fathers going through divorce. The book has tons of info-online resources, tips, personal stories, definitions of common divorce jargon, and more. It is written with compassion and precision. 

Thanks to Men Mentoring Men for the book sample!

* I received a copy of Fathering through Divorce to facilitate my candid and honest review. No other form of compensation was or will be given. All personal views are my own!



The Adventures of Princess Zaria said...

Sounds like a really good book. There needs to be more books on issues of fatherhood. Enjoyed your blog.

Mary512 said...

Thank you Zaria!

Ashley said...

I did not know there were books like this out there. It sounds like an extremely helpful book for any man to read who has to go through this problem.


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